I began last year in bed with the flu. This year, I began with my family—playing board games, watching fireworks, laughing (and secretly spitting out the awful-tasting champagne into the fresh snow when no one was watching). It was much more fun. If I had to summarize 2024 in one sentence, it would be this: the life I was waiting for is right here, right now.

Life is often compared to a rollercoaster, where bad times and good times alternate. During COVID, many people faced huge challenges and losses—myself included—as my whole life turned upside down with my divorce. I lost my identity as a godly wife, my devotion to education as a teacher, and the home I had been building since I left my parents’ house at 19. And life really is like a rollercoaster—because the downfall is sudden and terrifying, while the way up is slow and steady. It took me years to get here, to confidently say: I’m up again. This was the first year I could truly confirm that my life has changed for the better, and I’m immensely grateful for it. I have a home—more godly and joyful than ever before. I have precious people around me to love and care for. Everything I ever dreamed of is here. I can embrace it, be grateful, and enjoy it. I’m sure God has been with me the whole time. Now that a few years have passed, I can finally see the purpose in my suffering—how every single choice I made led me to this life. In my case, suffering made perfect sense.

2024

home is where heart is

In 2024, I spent the majority of my time at home. I didn’t travel, mostly worked from home, and on weekends, I usually stayed in, but I didn’t mind. The four of us truly love living together. Okay, to be fair, Domi sometimes gets frustrated when his little brother follows him everywhere, copying him like a devoted copycat. And I, too, occasionally get frustrated by things like the total lack of a tidy, perfectly organized home. But if these are our biggest frustrations, I’ll take them any day. The little one is now old enough to finally join in on any activity but still small enough to nap in the afternoon—so I easily nailed my goal of reading at least one book per month. Here’s the list, my top three recommendations, and key takeaways. Home is safety. It’s rest. It’s a place of healing and recharging. I wish everyone the chance to experience this at some point in their lives. I’m experiencing it at 32—and I’m carefully documenting it so that when bad days come, I’ll remember: I need to take it all in.

growing into a programmer is tough, but that’s okay

I remember the post I shared in a local IT Facebook group in 2023. By then, I had been working on web development projects for a while, but only two of them were live. I was looking for a mentor—someone who could give me more realistic projects to work on and provide feedback on my progress. I was simply hoping that one day, I’d get paid for doing what I love. So whenever I go through a stressful period—when every single client has a mysterious “ASAP” problem to solve, and I spend entire days figuring it out—I remind myself: it’s okay. It’s part of the process. I have to admit, as a junior developer, my work life this year wasn’t exactly calm or carefree. It was stressful, full of projects, struggles, and a massive amount of self-doubt. But looking back, I can see how much I’ve progressed. From never writing a line of PHP to confidently building entire site templates, working with backend data in arrays or objects, using custom functions to avoid redundancy, implementing logic, and even understanding how API development works in PHP. From never working with relational databases to creating complex database structures, querying them safely, updating data from the frontend, and learning tricks for building secure authentication and forms from scratch. I’ve also learned how to use Figma as a developer and how to implement (almost) pixel-perfect designs. I’ve improved in writing JavaScript for custom functionalities, implementing filtering and search, and working with libraries like Splide. I’m nowhere near a senior developer, but compared to my younger self, I can now see the progress. That said, when I was in the middle of a challenging task, under pressure from deadlines, I wasn’t always this reflective. I said things out of frustration that I deeply regret now. But honestly, most of my insecurities and stress came from the fear of not being good enough and the fear of losing my job because I wasn’t putting in enough effort. I have to admit, there were staff meetings where I walked in 100% convinced: “I’m soooo fired today.” But here’s something I want to share for those who might feel the same way: sometimes, your perception of other people’s opinion isn’t aligned with their actual opinion. In other words—stop ruining your life with overthinking!
In December, I had a conversation with my boss about my concerns that I might not have met expectations as a developer. I was over the moon when he assured me that this was absolutely not the case. Later, he sent me a message that I will treasure for the days when my impostor syndrome kicks in:

"I'm glad you shared these things with me, and I hope I was able to convince you that there’s nothing to worry about. It’s absolutely clear that you put your heart and soul into these tasks, and even into team building, which I especially appreciate because that’s something I struggle with. Any help is valuable (even just an idea—you don’t necessarily have to actively take part in organizing, as an idea alone can be worth gold). Besides all that, I truly think you are a very skilled, enthusiastic, and conscientious woman (and your pleasant company is a bonus). You handle tasks incredibly well, you’re willing to make sacrifices, work on Saturdays, and invest extra time when needed (and I promise I’ll try not to take advantage of that). These are all qualities that clearly prove not only that bringing you onto the team was a great decision, but also that we’re incredibly lucky to have you as part of it.
So keep up the great work, and if I can help with anything, I’m here to listen. Have a wonderful afternoon!"

2025

same old same old

Same goals: taking better care of myself through exercise, eating clean, sleeping at least eight hours, resting when my body needs recovery, and, in general, doing less while being more present with my family. At work, continuing to do great work—and creating even greater things with this amazing team.

stop wasting more time on learning mobile

Last year’s active free-time activities included socializing more in IT, going to the theater more often, reading for inspiration, creating a few websites for friends and family, and having fun with APIs and mobile development. But I discovered that mobile development isn’t something I’d invest much effort into. Not just because I personally don’t believe in mobile apps that much (statistics confirm the decline in interest, by the way—people are downloading fewer apps, while the number of apps in stores is growing at an extreme rate). I refuse to dive deeper into mobile (at least from the cross-platform side, like React Native or Flutter) because I think it’s too much effort for too little reward. A developer’s hands are tied—you have to rely on third-party libraries that become deprecated within months. A project you built just a few years ago might no longer be compatible with the current state of mobile development. I spent many weekends watching and following YouTube tutorials that seemed recent, only to realize that my setup didn’t work like the one in the video—not even the options were the same. I read the documentation too, but sometimes even the docs don’t mention when certain features have changed. I built a mobile app that finally worked—somehow (not even close to being public-ready, but at least I could run it in Expo Go). A few months later, it stopped working, and I couldn’t figure out why. This is completely different from what I do as a web developer (okay, maybe similar to the struggles React or Vue developers face). But when I code along with a youtuber like Traversy Media, everything works as expected—because things don’t change at such a rapid pace with core web technologies.

So no, I’m not going in that direction. Maybe one day, I’d learn native mobile development with Swift, but for now, I’m just disappointed in cross-platform mobile development. At work, I’d like to focus more on backend development—be more involved in writing APIs, as I genuinely enjoy working with raw data. I want to gain confidence in working on the server side.

pixel arts, tiles, maps and OOP in action

In my free time, I’m embracing a world that has always been dear to me and plays a huge role in our family’s funbeing (it’s like well-being, but more fun): gaming. Actually—game development. My seven-year-old’s current dream is to become a game developer (okay, I know everyone goes through that phase). But this kid has a mom who’s actually interested in coding, playing games, creating digital art, and spending creative time together as a family. So my husband and I agreed to spend our free time not just playing games but creating them. Besides my web developer team at work, a game development team is now forming at home. Domi (my kid) will be the artist—since he’s a certified Minecraft expert, he’ll handle pixel art, animations, and sound effects. Tom (my hubby), a professor of several legendary games—including Diablo 2 and StarCraft—and a retired gladiator of WoW Classic, will be the head of development and main story writer. I’ll be the researcher and factory worker—the one actually writing the code. And Rien, our two-year-old, will be the team’s special force, ensuring work-life balance by keeping us away from the computer long enough for our bodies to actually produce vitamin D. More details on this family project to come! I’m considering returning to Twitch or at least making a few videos about it—partly because I think our enthusiasm is infectious, but also because so many people have negative opinions about computer games and kids’ screen time. As a mother and someone with a background in education and psychology, I’d love to share my perspective—not as a counterargument, but as a unique point of view that’s worth thinking about.

To everyone reading this blog in 2025: I wonder who you are and why you’re taking time out of your day to read someone else’s random thoughts. But you know what? I think that’s a great investment. This simple habit—reading, reflecting, and engaging with other people’s ideas—has led humanity to some of its greatest realizations and most amazing new ideas! If you feel like sharing anything, here’s another contact button for you—I promise I’ll answer in person, 100%.

Let’s get in touch!